Friday, March 27, 2009


yeah so i think i'm over the things i wrote in "thoughts." thanks to ralfi for kicking my butt to make a video :)

i appreciate all your comments on that rather emo blog post i wrote there though. and sorry about the whining haha <3

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

the bird.

I'm confident about my art."Pink Bird Standing On A Banana For No Apparent Reason With Two happy Cherries In The Background"

20:25 and omg i am SO bored.
20:25 wow.
20:25 make a video!
20:25 or not
20:25 meh
20:25 paint a lovely picture of a bird?
20:26 wtf??
20:26 NO
20:26 -.-
20:26 why not??
20:26 it might be fun
20:26 why would i????????????
20:26 i think i'm gonna watch some twin peaks.
20:26 because you are bored?
20:26 the pizza went to your head, it seems.
20:27 no no.. food was missing... now I'm more me (or not, I don't know what I'm saying.. maybe you're right)
20:28 I want you to paint a picture of a bird and than twitpic it or something
that could be fun
20:28 uhm
20:28 i could do that
20:28 i just have no pens or crayons or anything.
20:28 OH
20:28 i could use paintbrush
20:28 there you go!
20:28 or try to. because it's probably gonna crash every 2 minutes
ok FINE.
20:29 weeee

Tuesday, March 24, 2009


[dramatic] i feel like i've shoved my main channel into a hole and i don't know how to drag it out of it again. [/dramatic]

seriously, dearest blog reader, i need to do something with my main channel. and i don't mean another frikken learn german video. as much as i like being some sort of "teacher" for a few minutes (yes, as silly as it is, saying the words "my name is kiwi and i'm gonna be your host for today" somehow gets me into a mood that makes it fun to film these even though i hate that series. there. i said it.) this is just not what i wanted to do with my channel. ever.

it's ok to me if people think of me as "that german girl" but i feel like all anyone ever wants or expects from my main channel are these videos. and it's just no fun.

(and i know - you're gonna comment now, saying something like: "it's not true!! i like your other videos too!" because you're nice and if you made your way through the web to this blog and take the time to read it and even leave a comment i'm quite sure it's not just because of those silly language videos, but i know that the majority of my "audience" [weird term in my head. people have computers and they watch videos of other people with a webcam. no big deal. "audience". haha!!] subscribed to me because of those videos, and therefor expects more of them, and probably only wants to see those videos. i can't tell you how many times i get comments on my other videos that go something like this: "i like her learn german videos, but this was crap." of course in third person. because why talk to me directly. anyway!! see my point there? 90% of the youtube messages i get are about those videos. 90% of my comments are on those videos. you. get. my. point. here.)

and i'm aware that those videos are responsible for a lot of good things that happened to me through youtube and i'm thankful for that and like i said, i kinda enjoy making them sometimes, but it's still not the direction i ever wanted to take with my channel. i've signed up as a "director", category: "variety". and that's what i want. and that's what i need to get back to or otherwise i'm afraid i'll never post another video on my main channel again. and even though i like my other two channels as well, i've always loved my main channel, and right now i could care less about it.
alright, i don't even have the time to make videos right now (yes, not even "daily" vlogs, even though i'm sure i'll make a vlog on my secondary channel in the near future. simple and easy and blah) and the technical issues are a factor there too, it's just so not motivating, but yeah.. you get my point here :)

i'm gonna stop bitching and whining now and wish you a good day/night/morning/etc.


Sunday, March 22, 2009

micro-blogging super cloud

oh this is pretty!
i totally stole this idea from jasmine. i use twitter a lot more than any other website, and having a word-cloud of the most used words in nice colors and stuff is a sweet idea.(you can make your own at tweetstats. use wordle for a pretty layout!)

Friday, March 20, 2009

it's a list.

it's 2009. the year has been good to me so far, things are going well and i feel like going with the flow here and i thought changing a few things about myself would be a good idea.
and why the fuck not make a list on my blog about those things, right?

  • trust. yourself and others.
  • enjoy what's good and don't worry about what may go wrong in the future, since it doesn't go wrong right now, there's no need to worry.
  • open up more towards people you care about.
  • don't think too complicated.
  • don't procrastinate so damn much.
  • be honest. towards yourself and others.
  • don't hold grudges.
  • live for yourself.
  • love for yourself.
and that, my dearest blog reader, is about it. a few simple points really. we'll see how that goes.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

ha. LIFE.

i haven't blogged in a while. i love how i mention that everytime i write something here now. i'm sure you love it too, dearest blog reader. btw, you're looking GOOD today. have you done something with your hair? sexy!
anyway. back to ME.
i must admit, the good old real life has taken over my internet interests lately. but fear not!!! i'm here now, all yours and stuff. even though busy times are ahead of me, i have to admit that i kinda sorta missed my online-life, so here i am, trying another attempt at getting back to that. we'll see how my time management will work together with that idea.

so i think it's about time i mention that i'll move soon. munich is a pretty city, but it's not for me. at least not living here. it's always gonna be my hometown. i was born here, i lived here for the first 6 years of my life, i went back here in 2006, got my first own apartment and all that. blah blah growing up etc.

but then i fell in love.

i fell in love with berlin, and that's exactly where i'm gonna go pretty soon. and maybe maybe maybe there are other things that make my decision to go there feel even better and make me be even more impatient about it all, but that, my dearest blog reader, is none of your freaking business :)

so anyway! now you know ;)

also, let me share my recently learned life-lesson with you in form of a picture i stole from ben's blog:

i hope you're doing fabulous, sexiest reader, and i shall talk to you soon!!