That's inappropriate!!!!

Some of you may already know that little website called BlogTV, that for a few weeks now has made it into the YouTube world and drawn some of us into its vicious circle..
For the ones that do not know the website, I shall describe it a little bit for your reading pleasure.

BlogTV is a website that closes the gap between our beloved Stickam and our dearest YouTube. It's like an interactive video / chatroom thingie, only that those videos / chatrooms are called "Shows", and that there isn't really a bigger concept behind it, other than almost complete freedom for the hosts to do whatever it is they want to do. (Of course there are restrictions, like nudity and whatnot, but who really cares, right?)
So you have one person who hosts the show, possibly a cohost (that works, too) and then a whole bunch of usernames, getting their freak on in the attached chatroom. I think that's about all there is to know about the basics of BlogTV.

And because I like to share more of my wisdom, here is something like a 5 part PSA about the dangers of said website. Enjoy. And then run away.

1. Don't go there if you ever wanna do something productive ever again (I used the word "ever" twice, to emphasize the importance of this statement). The temptation to switch from one show to the next is big, and staying in one room for hours and hours is even bigger.
2. You automatically become a pervert over at this website. I don't know why or how the transformation works, but trust me people, it does happen. A lot. And all of a sudden you find yourself in a room, pretty much publicly cybering with the host. You ask "What the hell?" - I can't give you an answer. I have no idea what happens there, but like I said: It just happens. Be prepared. Now you'll think: "But I'm not like that!! That would never happen to me!!" Oh trust me, it does. I'm not that much of a pervert normally, but BlogTV is a whole different reality, really.
3. Forget sleep, forget food, forget your normal everyday activities. You will not be able to do any of this if you get drawn into the BlogTV hell. Not that I don't enjoy it, but I'm sure drug addicts enjoy their daily dose as well. And we all know how healthy THAT is.
4. Be ready to lose braincells. Like in the world of drug addiction, BlogTV manages to take away some of your motor functions, such as being able to type correctly, as well as your general spelling or grammar skillz (assuming you ever had any) and makes you dream about weird things like chat windows and conversations that may have happened, although when you wake up, it's hard to decide if they did or if you only thought they did.
5. I hope the previous points have been convincing enough to make you not want to go to that website of doom, but just in case you decide to go nevertheless, don't feel too sad about getting kicked out of a room by one of the mods. Now I really can't think of people who would be that cruel and kick normal users or guests just for the fun of it.. but I've heard things like that happen every now and then.. although I'd never do such a thing. Really. Promise. Or something like that.

So I hope this blog post has taught you enough about BlogTV to make you realize it would be best to never ever ever ever go there. Or even sign up for it. DON'T DO IT!

But just in case you do, add me!! And don't say I didn't warn you.

Wow.

Just wow.
I cannot believe how fucked up my sleeping pattern is right now.
I can't even tell you how much because it's a shame, really. I blame the heat (and maybe, but just maybe, a few people). It's just way too hot during the day to actually do something, so everything I have to do during the day I just delay until it's not that hot anymore.
And I want to make a video but .. it's just too frikken hot people!! TOO HOT I says.
So once again I'm on the internet, complaining about the weather. THE WEATHER. It's ridiculous. I seem to be obsessed with it. Maybe I am. Who knows?

But what I really wanted to say is HI how are you guys? Sorry I've been neglecting my blog so much lately! I know that 2 or even 3 people actually care, so sorry for that! But you know why? BECAUSE IT'S TOO FRIKKEN HOT!!!

Ok I'm done now.
A mediocre blog rant, brought to you by speedyconkiwi productions.

Ugh I need sleep.

-----

Edit:
It's almost 1pm now, and I'm still not asleep. Instead I made a phone call that I was kind of nervous about, but when I called I was mistaken for someone else and greeted with "Moin!!" (I'm not gonna explain that now), then short awkward silence, then laughing, and that broke the ice and it wasn't as weird as I thought it would be. Yay!

loveCULT

I'm not gonna start with the background story to this, because who cares, right? But look at this fepic thing right here:We're surrounding your internet. With love.

Frontpage? Are you kidding me?

When I woke up today, I noticed a slight increase of comments on the video from my German channel (like... 100, and counting). And although I kinda knew what had to be going on, I was still pretty surprised when I checked the German frontpage of YouTube and saw this:And oh so many people who demand to have 4:36 minutes of their life back.. I wouldn't even know where to start lmao
But besides that (and I really could care less about those comments) I got a bunch of comments from people saying that they really liked seeing more German vlogs on YouTube, and that really made me happy! As you know from the beginning I wasn't really sure about the whole vlogging in German thing, and it still feels kinda weird just because everything video related works in English in my head.
Those positive comments however honestly motivate me to make more videos on that channel and now I finally have something new to talk about there as well lol
The negative comments are ridiculous and I love them! For a few weeks now I've had the idea of collecting negative German comments and make a video like "How to be a good hater" or something, which would be an awesome collab and I think I wanna make it on the German channel.
So that should give me a lot more examples that should be useful for that.

Now let's see how long it will take for real life people to find me there ô___Ô

Happy week!
Kiwi

PS: Apparently using copyrighted music is not a reason not to get featured in Germany. Good to know.

Bannerz and other shtuff

So today I officially became a YouTube partner. This is so weird! I have autoplay (which right now is fun, but I'm sure it will annoy me, and YOU, very very very soon lol), I can upload banners and have all those other options for my channel design.
WEIRD!
But really cool at the same time. I just seriously need to change the way my channel looks. Besides that: picture me doing a happy dance, because that's what I feel like doing right now lol

As some of you know, the partner program wasn't open for Germany until now. I got an invitation in the mail yesterday, applied, got accepted, set up my AdSense account, connected my YouTube account with that AdSense thing, got the confirmation, and that was it. Basically.
Really cool!

I hope everyone is having a fabulous rest of the week and a spectacular weekend, and I shall see you soon!

FIERCE!!!

How to make a shitty day a looot better:

Step one: put some nasty shite in your
hair and take a pretty silly picture.

Step two: Work it!!

Oh I feel like Alicia Witt as Zoey Woodbine in Cybill, which btw is one of my favorite shows of all time, just as a sidenote.

I love it!!! :D

Look at that!

I'm on utubedrama again, what fun.
Now kids, here's what we can learn from this experience:

1. Trevor is excellent with grammar.
2. I have 382 German sock accounts. Or maybe even more.
3. The term "German sock account" is known all over the internet.
   
4. I'm a partner now.
5. Thousands of people unsubscribe from me everyday because of my Learn German series. (if I were you, I would too)
6. I have teamed up with Victor to surround your internets.
   

So sad

Oh I will never ever get my hair to be like this again. Such a sad thing, really. ; (

Shalalala

As if I wasn't pimping it enough already... (and I'm pretty sure I'll mention it in a video sometime soon as well *sigh*)
So here's my German vlog. Felt weird to record, felt ok to edit, turned out pretty good I think.
I'm sorry for missing subtitles, but that's just way too much work, really. Basically, it's just an introduction of me, what I do here on YT and why I now started making videos in German. Blah blag ;D
Bottom line: yay I did it!!

9am

My dearest reader, I am so full of ideas these days. Don't you love the feeling of "everything is possible" and "everything will be extremely awesome soon"?? Ok maybe it's just me, but I have those kinds of feelings every now and then, and even though I kind of haven't used any opportunities so far, and nothing has become extremely awesome (sounding emo much? Not meant to be) I still feel like that sometimes, and I honestly believe that it just brings me one step closer to figuring out this whole "life" thing everyone is talking about. And I'm not trying to sound like Joey Potter or anything, but srsly, isn't right now the time for me to do that? To figure it out? Take a path or maybe even two and follow them? Get ideas, try new things, believe in myself?
Well folks, I think it is. And so I have thought about the possibility of moving to Berlin. Why, you ask? Because it is cheap. Because it is a big city (not like Munich - the biggest village ever). And because it would also mean that I have to start becoming more independent. I always like to tell myself that I already am, but honestly, I'm not. [Also: come on, a city with a gay mayor sounds so much better than old conservative Munich. Srsly!!]
Now of course I'm absolutely not sure if this plan or idea will ever be implemented [that sounds weird, but my little online dictionary tells me that "to implement" is the right word here. Le sigh], but I thought by writing all this down, I have at least a reminder of some sort to follow and focus on.
Next step: finding a good reason why the hell I should move to the other side of the country. The family will not be pleased (oh how mafia of me muahuahua), but that's not my concern right now.

To end this post on a slighty lighter note, I have something that the fabulous Shelly likes to call an "instant snapshot", meaning a picture taken right after writing this blog (which I am sure will be fun for you because it's after 9am and I haven't slept and also I just washed my hair and what can I say? I'm just a big mess right now. In the most positive way of course!) and also a video of my current favorite song.

Oh and before I forget it: I am still not so sure about the whole vlogging in German thing.. I kinda tried it without recording anything, and it just felt so weiiiiiird. But oh well. I shall keep you posted. I mean after all it could be a fun (weiiiiiiird) experiment. Or something.

Okok, here's the picture:
And here's the song:


(That's "Paper Planes" by M.I.A. fyi)